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How did I get to E3? How did I get a VIP pass? I don't even know. The idea was that I would walk up to E3 and, telling nobody anything, manage to just get in. That's what happened.
It worked out pretty well.
I have business in the San Francisco Bay Area from late June to early August, so I figured I would fly in from Tokyo a week early, and check out E3. At the time, I didn't think it was a stupid idea to fly in to San Francisco International Airport, despite the Electronic Entertainment Expo being in Los Angeles. When I booked my ticket, I was only thinking that it would cost a lot more money to fly into Los Angeles from Tokyo and then fly back from San Francisco. I was hardly thinking that the entire goal of my trip to the United States was to make money so much money that a little bit here or there to upgrade my traveling comfort would be irrelevant in the Grand Scheme of Things. Halfway through the flight, I remembered the story of Miyamoto Musashi's duel with Sasaki Kojiro: Musashi said that Kojiro had lost the duel in the very first instant, when he cast his scabbard into the ocean.
Monday
Well, at least, flying into San Francisco meant I would get to enjoy something I seldom enjoy: a nice long drive in a genuinely scenic part of the world. The road from San Francisco to Los Angeles, whichever highway you choose, offers much more fantastic scenery in five hours than you're bound to experience locked up in your room staring at a computer screen for six weeks. I arrived at the airport, suffered through a long ordeal at immigration why they leave only six booths of eighteen open when there are clearly a thousand passengers waiting is beyond me and waited outside in the cool northern California breeze for twenty minutes before Bob's Chrysler Sebring ("When You Need a Convertible right now") slid up into a perfectly parallel-parked position. It was around that instant that I realized two attractive ladies were whispering about me over by an ashtray: Aha, it's because I am wearing a super-fly Adidas Originals track suit in the Japan-exclusive color of psycho-crayon-green. In front of me, a luggage cart, containing an enormous suitcase, my laptop bag, and a cardboard box full of computer. In my right hand, an Adidas Originals shopping bag containing an Adidas Originals track suit in the Japan-exclusive color of shiny piano black.
I'd heard someone say, a long time ago, that if you want people to remember you, you have to wear the same thing every day. That's why people remember, say, Mickey Mouse, or Super Mario. I've earned something of an . . . existing reputation as the guy with a Swedish schoolgirl haircut and ridiculous cartoon character glasses with twenty-four-karat gold studs in them. It was time to complete the look. I wasn't sure if green was the right color, though it was the gaudiest, weirdest color that the Shinjuku Adidas Originals store had this season, so I rolled with it.
Despite my engorged interest in the National Basketball Association, it wasn't until I'd landed in San Francisco and picked up a discarded copy of the New York Times that it dawned on me: The Los Angeles Lakers were facing the Boston Celtics in the NBA Finals in Los Angeles. At the Staples Center. Next door to the Los Angeles Convention Center. Where the Electronic Entertainment Expo was held. Crayon-green was the Boston Celtics' primary color. Oh man. This situation was bound to get gorgeous real quick.
Days later, following the Lakers' victory, minutes after a man threw a lit cigarette into the open Sebring, burning a hole halfway into the nylon of my track pants right up above the knee, moments before a dozen rioters grabbed our car and tried maybe-seriously to tip it over, our car drifted to a stop in front of Cheapassgamer.com's own Cheapy D and Wedbush Securities analyst Michael Pachter, who took one look at my pants, told me I'd better take them off, and warned me, "You're gonna get fuckin' stabbed."
I didn't get fuckin' stabbed, though the possibility of it occurred to me in that breezeway as Bob popped the trunk on Monday morning. We stuffed my stuff into the car; I took the shopping bag into the front seat.
"We need to maximize our visibility," I told Bob. "In a couple years, we're going to have enough money to rent a booth. We need to think about that. This year, we don't have a booth this year, we are a walking, talking booth."
"Okay."
Maybe Bob was tired. We pulled off the highway and into the first shopping center outside the airport. Lo and behold: a Chipotle.
The sun was terrifying. Just to fight a migraine, I had to squint so hard that I could barely see. I had to squint so hard I could have looked right at an eclipse. I grimaced in a Walgreens parking lot while Bob went in to get cash and cigarettes. Hands on my hips. I unzipped my jacket, and there I was in a Russian Tuxedo: track suit and tank-top. A couple of college girls looked at me. It struck me, instantly, that I was probably a huge joke to...
How I Didn't Get Killed At E3 [Column]
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Magic Bullet Deluxe 25 pc Set Blender Mixer
Kitchen (AS SEEN ON TV)
List Price: $99.99
Not Magic, but still Cool - Super Easy to Clean!
Of course it doesn't work exactly like the informercial. It can't really defy the laws of physics (or cooking), but it's great at what it does do (chop and blend small amounts of things), and it's super easy to clean (my favorite part, a blender that isn't a huge hassle clean!). I also like that it isn't at all bulky like a full size blender. I can just leave the base out on the counter, and all the parts and accessories fit into one drawer. I've had mine for only a few days and I've been using it several times a day already for smoothies, coffee drinks and egg dishes.A couple of warnings, though...To get the most out of this product you need to read the manual (seriously, I don't normally read the manuals for products I buy, but this one is extremely useful). A lot of the concerns that I've seen in the reviews I've read are adressed there, and there's lots of tips about little things you can do to get the bullet to work better (which blade to use for different... 5/5 Gothic Lollipop (Weatherford, TX) - See all my reviews This review is from: Magic Bullet Deluxe 25 pc Set Blender Mixer Of course it doesn't work exactly like the informercial. It can't really defy the laws of physics (or cooking), but it's great at what it does do (chop and blend small amounts of things), and it's super easy to clean (my favorite part, a blender that isn't a huge hassle clean!). I also like that it isn't at all bulky like a full size blender. I can just leave the base out on the counter, and all the parts and accessories fit into one drawer. I've had mine for only a few days and I've been using it several times a day already for smoothies, coffee drinks and egg dishes.A couple of warnings, though...To get the most out of this product you need to read the manual (seriously, I don't normally read the manuals for products I buy, but this one is extremely useful). A lot of the concerns that I've seen in the reviews I've read are adressed there, and there's lots of tips about little things you can do to get the bullet to work better (which blade to use for different... Read more Help other customers find the most helpful reviews Was this review helpful to you? , January 8, 2011Great product - short lifespan
I love using the Magic Bullet for the reasons listed on this site - mainly convenience of use and cleanup. Here is the catch, however. My first Magic Bullet lasted about 6 months with daily usage. I thought that the short lifespan was a fluke, so I bought another Magic Bullet. The second one lasted about two months with daily usage. Daily usage was making smoothies and grinding cheese, ice, nuts - nothing unusual, according to the sales pitch.Believe it or not, I'm looking to buy a third Magic Bullet because of the convenience (it literally cleans up in seconds vs. a blender because the blade is easier to get at), but now I know that I'm only going to have it for a short time. 3/5 Sunny California "Beeziemom" (Sunnyvale, CA USA) - See all my reviews I love using the Magic Bullet for the reasons listed on this site - mainly convenience of use and cleanup. Here is the catch, however. My first Magic Bullet lasted about 6 months with daily usage. I thought that the short lifespan was a fluke, so I bought another Magic Bullet. The second one lasted about two months with daily usage. Daily usage was making smoothies and grinding cheese, ice, nuts - nothing unusual, according to the sales pitch.Believe it or not, I'm looking to buy a third Magic Bullet because of the convenience (it literally cleans up in seconds vs. a blender because the blade is easier to get at), but now I know that I'm only going to have it for a short time. Help other customers find the most helpful reviews Was this review helpful to you? , July 19, 2008pretty nice
Small, compact, and versitle. I think it is a great product and pretty affordable.One note: the blades will rust slightly if you don't turn them upside down in the dishwasher. So just make sure the blades are facing towards the floor when you run them through the dishwasher. 4/5 my name "amazon shopper" (cali) - See all my reviews Small, compact, and versitle. I think it is a great product and pretty affordable.One note: the blades will rust slightly if you don't turn them upside down in the dishwasher. So just make sure the blades are facing towards the floor when you run them through the dishwasher. Help other customers find the most helpful reviews Was this review helpful to you? , October 23, 2005
Price: $49.95
You Save: $50.04 (50%)THE MAGIC BULLETCHOPS,WHIPS, BLENDS AND MUCH MUCH MORE -

Magic Bullet MBR-1701 17-Piece Express Mixing Set
Kitchen (Magic Bullet)
List Price: $59.99
Works well, but not for all foods
I received my Magic Bullet set as a gift, after coveting it for quite some time(love that informercial!). After owning it and using it, I still love it, but I did have to adjust my expectations a bit.It works wonderfully for soft foods. It is great for making dips, sauces, marinades, salad dressings, tapenades... It is great for blending soft foods, for making emulsions, whipping cream... I have made great hummus in my Magic Bullet, as well as chicken salad. You get the idea.It also makes an EXCELLENT coffee grinder!What it does not do is work like a normal food processor, in that it cannot process harder foods. Raw vegetables are a no. Also, forget crushing ice! Those mugs that come with the set are a cute idea, but they are useless. You cannot make a frozen drink with the Magic Bullet because all it does is throw the ice around in circles.So, If you want a real food processor, do not buy this one. If you want a light-weight and small processor that... 3/5 D. Satow (NY, United States) - See all my reviews, August 24, 2009A Great Little Blender
According to the Amazon data base, I purchased the Magic Bullet in March. It is hard to believe that I've been using this blender at least twice every day since. I have used it primarily as a "frozen" drink maker--some would call them smoothies, I call them meal replacement drinks. I have also ground coffee beans to an espresso grind; made pesto, salad dressing, and use it to mix the wet ingredients for my seitan.What I have learned: the heavier ingredients need to go into the cup first and then the lighter ingredients, whatever they are. When making pesto, this means that the nuts go in first, followed by the cheese (especially if you are using a chunk of cheese as opposed to shredded) and then the basil. If you are using olive oil, it should actually go in last. The reason for the importance of the order is that the blade, while it is put on top of the cup, is actually the bottom of the blender. Putting the heavier ingredients into the cup first help insure smoother... 4/5 M. K. Blue (California) - See all my reviews, November 21, 2009Product is poorly constructed & Customer Service is not good
This is a great little machine. Does not do everything according to the infomercial but is compact and handy with what it does. However the construction is bad. My blade assembly started leaking under the blade and the customer service refused to replace it because I did not have the receipt. I paid for a new blade which again started leaking in a few months, they are willing to replace it but now want me to pay for shipping&handling. I have spent enough on this machine, even bought a few as gifts, I am disappointed that it is not long lasting. 1/5 MMM - See all my reviews This review is from: Magic Bullet MBR-1701 17-Piece Express Mixing Set (Kitchen) This is a great little machine. Does not do everything according to the infomercial but is compact and handy with what it does. However the construction is bad. My blade assembly started leaking under the blade and the customer service refused to replace it because I did not have the receipt. I paid for a new blade which again started leaking in a few months, they are willing to replace it but now want me to pay for shipping&handling. I have spent enough on this machine, even bought a few as gifts, I am disappointed that it is not long lasting. Help other customers find the most helpful reviews Was this review helpful to you? , September 2, 200917-piece high-speed mixing system chops, whips, blends, and moreIncludes power base, 2 blades, 2 cups, 4 mugs, 2 sealed lids, 2 vented lids, and recipesDurable see-through construction; press down for results in 10 seconds or lessMicrowave- and freezer-safe cups and mugs; dishwasher-safe partsMeasures approximately 4 by 4 by 10 inches; 1-year limited warranty
The Original Magic Bullet - Part 1
www.BuyTheBullet.com The Original Magic Bullet Infomercial.
The Original Magic Bullet - Part 2
www.BuyTheBullet.com The Original Magic Bullet Infomercial.